You find it hard to talk about stuff - you bottle things up?

You're having conflict with your partner and/or family?

You're a victim of violence?

You're getting in trouble
with the police?

You assault people when drinking?

You have trouble controlling your temper - you have a "short fuse"?

People tell you that you have a problem with your temper?

John was angry that he was forced to come to an SVS programme. He was angry, hurt and confused that Liz had left. He couldn't understand why Liz had taken out a protection order against him.

There was a heap of anguish and uncertainty for John - Why me? How dare they! How dare she!

John met other men who were in the same boat - who, having recognised their need to do something, had come to the group under their own steam. He learned how his put-downs, pushing, threatening, and controlling behaviour had left Liz no option but to go.

He saw how his behaviour had affected Liz and the children, how he had blamed them for his abuse and violence, and how his thinking convinced him it was OK to act in the way he did.

He also learned the skills for living in a long-term relationship. For John, life is no longer violent and abusive. For Liz, there is not the fear when John came to pick up the children on his access days.